15th June, 2004: Seeking for alternatives

Ever since I received the first exam score from my class, I felt I would end up this way. What way? Cannot continue for school due to getting bad grades. I've feared by that feeling for a year. Today I received a letter from the Dean. It says I didn't meet the college requirement. I cannot continue for the next semester. It's quite disappointed for me. Since I tried hard and I got nothing back. I talked with my parents about this. I told them what I'll do and what my plans were. I feel sorry to myself as well as my family. I apologize to those that have been supporting me and cheering for me for the past year. I just couldn't make it. I need a second chance. I do not want to blow it up. I'm not that kind of person who can give it up easily. I've to adjust myself and correct myself to the right conditon. I always carried the word "FEAR" wherever I was. I really want to get rid of the FEAR that I always have whenver I face on my studying. It's been a nice experience to stay in this top school (it was my dream), though I didn't make many friends and got upset by the grades. I defintely learned a lot of things out of this year. I have to change the concept facing exams. Exam is not a competition of how smart people are, it's a competition of how much effort you put into your work/preparation. Hope that helps later on for me. NBA FInals: Detriot won the last home game and beat the Lakers with the series of 4-1. My man "Big Ben" Wallace had done a nice job in scoring and defending. They deserve the NBA champ this year. Congrat for them.